I sat all night in the temple courtyard
Listening to owls question the night.
The sun rose and asked if I had slept.
Older men shook their heads and left
While I stayed and counted coins.
Payment given for a job undone.
A wash of shame like rain poured
When I looked into your marble face.
They said the likeness was uncanny.
A letter from Father I regret I read
Crumpled in one hand. I think I’ll
Break my teeth if I don’t unclench.
I wish we could talk, no,
I wish you could talk.
I’d rather it was you than me.
Not enough gold, silver, or gems
To stop what I’ve begun.
Your grave proves that.
I say I’ll visit, I lie to myself,
They can’t know you’re here.
I can’t know, but I messed that up too.
The first secret I’ll keep is who you were, the second, where you’re buried.