It has been a while.
294 days.
Roughly 80% of 2017.
A half dozen excuses come to mind to explain the time gap. Switching jobs, relationships changing, moving... But the simplest answer is usually the one that holds the most truth, and the truth is what I'll give you all.
Every time I tried to write, or to type out something, a large man dressed like Mario, the main character of Super Mario Bros., would pour honey all over my hands.
I tried a multitude of methods to keep the honey assailant away from my work, but time and time again, he found his way to me. I tried locking my doors, but he climbed in the windows. I closed the windows and he somehow got a key to my apartment. I tried to tell the managerial staff of my complex, but he had doctored my lease and added himself to it so that he had legal authority to enter my apartment. I tried to call the police, but he showed up in a cop car to answer the call (I think he moonlights as a police officer, but I cannot confirm, as he never spoke a word to me). Needless to say it has been a scary few months.
At this point you might be wondering, "But Connor, how are you writing this now?" An excellent question, and straight to the point: I did have to lure him into the forest to have him killed by wolves, with whom I made a blood pact years ago for just such occasions.
"But Connor!" you may be exclaiming at this moment. "That sounds like premeditated murder! That's extremely illegal, even if it does sound slightly metal, and was a good use of resources." Well, thank you for saying so, I did think it was quite clever. And rest assured, it was very illegal.
"...I'm still concerned about the murder," you might be saying, both puzzled and slightly worried. "You really didn't clear anything up." Aha! How I've missed you and this banter we have!
"Okay, so you're just going to gloss over this?" you're no doubt saying, quite cross at me. And you'd be correct! Let's move on.
A great many things have changed for me in this past year, but I'm happy to say my desire for writing has not. Though my posting has been minimal this past year, I did manage to write a bit as time went on. Will I be sharing all of that? No, as most of it is incomplete, rough ideas. But there are a few kernels in there that I've been slow cooking for a while! Plenty of pieces that just need a quick edit before I post them. Writings shall return to the Archive during the new year. I have no plans to shut it down, even if it goes quiet from time to time.
Thank you for reading, and I look forward to posting 20% of the time next year.
P.S. You're now an accomplice to the crime I spoke of earlier. Snitches get stitches!